Integrity, Values and Happiness

photo credit: Glory Rumours Photos

This is a story a friend of mine shared with me yesterday. You might have heard it before, but I urge you to participate since I think it will be a lot of fun.

After a shipwreck, just a handful people survive. Clinging to dear life, they sail away  on 2 boats. One boat has a lady, the captain and an old man. The other boat has the lady’s fiance’ and a few other people.

Once the boat makes it to the island, the lady realizes that her fiance’s boat has not reached the same island. Perhaps they sailed off to the neighboring island? She is sad but determined to get her lover back. So she approaches the captain and requests him to fix their boat so that they can sail to the other island and find her lover. “Please, please”, she begs him.

Just having survived the shipwreck, the Captain has no desire to throw himself at the face of death all over again. But after much pleading he says, “Okay, I will do it. But you will have to sleep with me first”.

The lady is torn. She does not know what to do. She goes over to the other survivor - the old man and asks him what he thinks she should do. “Follow your heart, young lady. Just follow your heart”, he says.

The lady goes back and agrees to fulfill the Captain’s wish. The Captain then fixes the boat and they all sail away to the next island. The lady is estatic to find her lover there, alive and safe! They hug and kiss. Tears flow. She then tells her lover the whole story. The story really disturbs the lover. He is in shock. He is very upset. “Oh, how could you do this to me? I waited all alone for you, for so long…how could you tarnish what we have?”, he says, “I want nothing to do with you anymore!”.

The lady is in tears. The Captain feels terrible for the lady. He puts his arms around her and says, ” I am always here for you, if you ever need me.”

Okay, story done.

This is what you do now:

1. Now that you heard the story, who, amongst all the people in the story do you think has the  most integrity? Who do you think has the least integrity?

2. And why?

Share what you think in the comments. DO NOT read the comments before you have answered the questions above in your head!

3. Next, read the comments and see if you are influenced in any way. Does your decision change?

If you think you are absolutely right,I encourage you to make your case.

Why are we doing this?

The people in the story all made choices and decisions. And we judged them. Each one of their actions and our judgment is based on our individual value systems. Happiness is a result of our choices and our values. Happiness means different things to different people. We can all be happy, in very different ways. We can all make choices that are different from the choices made by the people we love, but that is okay. Our perspectives differ, our values differ and our lives differ. Making choices that our loved ones don’t necessarily make does not mean we do not love each other. It is an opportunity to understand and grow.

When I played this game with my friend I made my choices. And then he started to talk about his choices. It was amazing how my answers started to change when I started to see his perspective….even after I was so convinced with my own answers. Hopefully, you all will share what your initial reactions were and if your perspective changed when you saw a point of view that was different from yours ….

Thanks for playing!

When I sit down to tell my 2 year old a story, her eyes just light up. Within a minute, she is deeply immersed in the story. She listens to the story like she is listening to it for the first time … every time …

What is it about stories and little kids, I wonder?

pic by KoAn La Scrivana

And then it happens with ME too …

I am incredibly happy with my life these days. But even in the saddest of times, my tears roll down for someone else …when I read or watch a story about somebody else’s life. (Like when I watched the video on Lance’s post yesterday). Happy feelings too - like I felt incredibly special when I read this poem by Lucas Bright at Writer Dad’s blog. And then Eric’s guest post at Zenhabits brought back some memories of my own and filled me with a sense of gratitude for my life.

Time and again, the best bloggers will tell you share your stories on your blog. Entrepreneurs will tell you to give your story when you pitch an idea or you want to make a connection. Penelope Trunk angers a lot of her readers time and again, but then she also writes posts like this one and this. I disagree with her vehemently over and over again but then I love her a lot.

Why do stories work?

• Stories have nothing to do with me: Why do stories that have absolutely nothing to do with me or my life make such a  big impact on me? The answer is hidden in that question. When a story has nothing to do with me but is intense and engrossing, I insert myself in the story and come alive. I come alive and then flow along. I flow along and then start to feel. I feel the story and then I feel the story of my life. It is a beautiful process and it works - once, twice, every time. That is why I love stories. I figure that is why my 2 year old loves stories.

• Stories evoke emotions: We all build walls to protect ourselves from emotional abuse. We are all very guarded when it comes to feeling emotional about our own lives. No so when it comes to another person’s life, right? We can shed a tear and not feel weak. We can be moved and not seem emotional.




• Stories are stories: When we listen to stories, we rarely question it’s authenticity. When we start to read a story, little facts seem to matter … but rarely do they matter after a certain point. Real or fictitious, a story always has real effects on us, never fictitious.

• Stories are the best way to get you back to a “feeling” or a “state of mind”: When we feel certain negative or unwanted feelings, emotions or fears, it is not easy to just shoo them away. Stories are great in that they transport us  away so gently into a different world, where we can “feel” the right things without thinking as much about feeling the right things. (Complicated sentence there, sorry!)

Should I tell my story?

The whole point of this post is to try and convince everyone that we all need to find our stories. We then need to tell our stories. Tell our stories to ourselves and to the people in our lives. To our employers and to our friends. To the VC’s and to our kids.

Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. Everyone has skills. Everyone has goals and ambitions. Everyone has plans for success. Everyone has had their share of struggles.  So what is the big deal? Right? The big deal is the story that connects the dots. The story that brings all of the strengths, weaknesses, skills, goals, ambitions, plans and every crap under the sun together in a unique way and tells your special story. None of the adjectives in the story are unique, but somehow, almost magically, the story is special, very unique and only yours. This is what Naomi Dunford does. Read her story here and then come back and tell me if it did not do something to you.

So, go deep into yourselves and find your story. I urge you. And then, go out into the world and tell your story. Tell yourself your story every day, every single day. Believe in yourself and stay true to your story. Never ever forget your story. It is who you are. It is who you will always be. Special. Like Lucas Bright

We all have plenty of stories. What is your story? How has telling others and yourself your story changed your life?

What is my story?

I will come back and share my story in my next post here. If you have read my earlier posts, you already  know some of my stories.

Authentic Business Discovery

For now, I would like to take some time to talk about Tom Volkar’s Business Discovery Class that I participated in a couple of weeks ago. I am working on my internet based startup (details will be in the upcoming story) and was curious to see what the class would offer. The class was a wonderful experience! When I sat back and thought about what the class really gave me, I came up with this post. The class helped me find my story and tell my story

I have to say the journey was amazing. And it was not much unlike some of the most satisfying experiences in our lives – we do most of the work and we gain most of the satisfaction – only someone really cool(read Tom) steers us ever so lightly in the right direction, nudging us back on to our paths. In essence, this class was a wonderful journey, a refreshing experience and loads of hard work.  In a week’s time, my journey involved traveling inwards and outwards, back in time and ahead into the years that will follow. It gave me my story. Honestly, the class taught me very little I did not know, but what it really did was establish the vital connections – between my past and my future, between my values and my desires, between my dreams and the action steps required to fulfill them. Looking back, the connections are a key part of understanding ourselves. There will be plenty of times when I will be unsure, when I will question my past decisions and the future path I have laid out for myself, but understanding those connections will help me “reboot” myself and get focused.

Tom is a great guy. He is very experienced in his field. He gets involved without getting in your face. He makes you work hard and asks the right questions. And if you push him like I did, he gives you lots of tools to get to your goal. He is great at customizing his class and taking feedback too.This is a great class if you are trying to jump into doing something on your own. Do feel free to contact me if you would like to know more.

For now, I look forward to hearing your stories. What makes you who you are today? What is it you love about your life and why? Is there something about yourself you will never ever change?

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Tags: story

Tricia stopped by here a couple of days ago. I followed her back to her blog. And I read this - a story about her dog Zach and how he reminds her to breathe. That is when it occurred to me that it is high time I shared what my husband and I have learned from our dogs!

A few of years ago, Pree(my husband) and I set out to train the dogs. We went to training classes, read books, asked friends…. Now after a few years of that and plenty of dog training, we can say how much learning we got in the process.  Enjoy! And yes, Iris and Charlie send you all lots of doggy hugs!

Do you have dogs? Do you love dogs? What have they taught you, if anything at all?

If you have enjoyed this article, I would really appreciate it if you could stumble/digg it.

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ThinkMaya has been chosen at the New Blog of The Week by Barbara at Blogging Without a Blog. I am excited about this and want to welcome everyone stopping by my blog!

photo by pasotraspaso

Starting this blog had been a long time dream and it felt great when I did. It felt wonderful, but not completely right yet. It was when people started to comment and share that I realized what I was missing. Knowing that I am being heard forms a big part of the fulfillment I get from this blog. The feedback on a post forms the bridge for me from one post to the next - an inspiration for new thoughts and learning.

I want to take this opportunity to thank everyone that has commented on my blog so far. I hope more people will share their thoughts on how my posts affect their lives and thinking, since I truly value that. I know a number of you have been around in the blog world for years - I welcome any sort of feedback and/or constructive criticism about this space.

And yes, if you like what you read here, please do subscribe to my blog. I do put in a lot of work into this blog. I promise to keep things interesting!

If you are short on time, I suggest you take a couple of minutes to see some slideshows accompanying some of my posts such as this one  for BlogActionDay and this one on the “thinkmaya Framework” for Happiness and Balance

And if you are in the Unites States today, please do get out and cast your vote! And come back and relax right here

image by Harpreet Thinking

It is Diwali. Our festival of lights. It is the most beautiful festival I have ever witnessed. It is the time for the best food, rangoli and firecrackers. The joy of families getting together, the clean homes all ready and lit up, the pretty clothes, the yummy food and the thrill of the firecrackers! As kids, we graduated to bigger and better firecrackers every year … it was a time for teasing, challenging and showing off. It was never enough!

When I first moved out of India, a lot of what Diwali was for me was sacred memories. Festivals had to be celebrated the way they were when I was growing up. A festival did not feel like one if I was not with the closest members of the family…For a few years, all I did was call home, wish family and feel miserable that I missed all the fun. Slowly, things changed. Every year, we host a big Diwali party in our home now. We invite a bunch of our friends from all cultures. We dress gorgeously, share yummy food and my husband will narrate a bunch of mythological stories behind the festival. I still have the memories from my childhood, but Diwali has a new meaning for me today …one of including, embracing and sharing.

Over the years, this has been a wonderful lesson for me. Embracing and sharing my cultural  background at work and in life (with people from different cultural backgrounds) has actually worked to strengthen my own cultural identity and my relationships with people. Counterintuitive eh? Perhaps. But humor me here as I try my best to make a strong case that we would do best at work and life by embracing and sharing our cultural identities:

• Nobody is blind to our cultural differences:

  As much as we like to say that cultural differences do not affect what we think or how we interact with a person, we have to agree that we are not blind to them. So let us just give up on the hope that we will just blend in at all cost. Instead, let us learn when to ignore these differences and when to enjoy them. When to respect the differences and when to celebrate them. At work, HR makes rules for legal purposes. It is time to understand that rules that say “everyone should be treated equal” do not mean “everyone is created the same”. It is a suggestion to embrace our differences responsibly.

• We are curious creatures:

  I have always been curious about other cultures, their languages and festivals. I find it incredibly exciting to exchange notes with friends and coworkers about their customs and practices. I try to remember that most people I meet are curious, just like me. If they do not ask questions about my culture it is because they are either ashamed of their lack of knowledge (this is my reason most times) or they are scared to ask wrong questions. So ask questions and be curious. But be respectful. Most often, the other person is very interested in sharing and learning. This applies to the work environment as well.

• We are insecure and complex creatures:

  We all have our insecurities. Knowingly or otherwise, these insecurities manifest in strange behaviors - a nasty remark, a petty act etc. Single isolated behaviors from people do not indicate intolerance. In fact, they are not an indication of anything. Always give people the benefit of doubt and do not assume anything, ever. And if you assume someone did/said something because of your race or cultural background, then you are the one at loss. Read an interesting story demonstrating that on Evelyn’s blog AttractionMindMap. Making a big deal of isolated events only creates a lot of animosity at the workplace and could unnecessarily affect our careers. Understand that typically people experience a lot more insecurities at the workplace and learn to let go of isolated events. Believe me, it will only make your life better.

• As much as we want to belong, we value our individuality:

  We are strange creatures, to say the least. In isolation we seek community. And when in a community, we long to set ourselves apart from everyone else. Why not embrace our cultural differences and take pride in the fact that we can all get along wonderfully while learning and experiencing other cultures? This will really help in our end goal of being special while being a part of the community. Share your food. Sing your songs. Enhance the lives of your neighbors and coworkers. Give them a special experience and be proud of it.

• We have no other choice, really:

  If you are still not convinced and think you might want to continue to try to blend in, let me put another thought in your head. If you are trying your hardest to conceal any cultural differences that exist between your coworkers and you or your neighbors and you, I strongly believe your act is not working. You will only end up seeming fake, distant and disinterested in real interaction. If that is your choice go ahead and pick it, but I’d rather choose embracing my cultural background and sharing it.

There is nothing wrong in trying to blend in at our work places or in the community. Especially if you happen to be the kind of person who had a natural tendency to blend in and stay out of the spotlight. All I am saying is that there is a lot more to be gained by embracing our cultural differences and learning from each other. If you enjoy sharing and celebrating, please do continue to do that even at your work places. People never get in trouble for being themselves and being authentic (without hurting others) and our coworkers and neighbors are a lot more open and accepting than we would believe. And guess what, if people do behave petty, it reflects on them, not on you. And THAT is not worth losing out on a world of special experiences!

I talk from my experience and I am curious to hear what people think. Do you see issues with what I have said? Have you had experiences that conflict with my views? Feel free to agree/disagree and voice yourselves!

Some Link Love

This week I happen to be immersed in a very engaging Authentic Discovery Class being led by Tom Volkar. I am also a part of an exciting community building experiment that Tom has going. I encourage you to check it out and sign up if you find it interesting.

Tags: culture

This is Part 3 of the Series titled “The key to happiness and balance is right with you, just learn to use it”. In Part 1 of the series, I told you exactly WHY we need a framework and introduced you to the “thinkmaya framework” foundation.In this Part 2 of the series, I talked about HOW we prepare ourselves to be able to apply the framework successfully. In Part 3(here), I will, with the help of 3 thinkmaya readers, introduce the framework and discuss a few of it’s applications

photo by koert michiels

Learning to use the framework

In this post I will discuss how to apply the thinkmaya framework. Three thinkmaya readers have graciously shared their situations with us. After giving an overview of each of the steps in the process I follow it with how each of the three readers would possibly apply it to their lives and their situations.

Before I start, here are the situations as shared by Mare, Lance and Stacey in their own words: Read the rest of this entry »

Tags: framework

No, I was not born into poverty. How incredibly lucky.

But I witnessed poverty every day of my childhood, growing up in India.

Children in extreme poverty.

Children who had everyday jobs.

Children who were less fortunate. Far less fortunate.

I resolved I would do my bit to help children in poverty once I am able to earn my living. I have been earning for almost 10 years and I am sorry to say I have done nothing.

Nothing for ten years. Nothing about an issue that is so close to my heart.

This is my wake up call.

Do your part to make a difference. And leave me a comment here and I will donate a $ for you.

“The opposite of love is not hatred. It is indifference” - Elie Wiesel

I had a calling to write this post. I apologize for this little interruption in my “thinkmaya framework” series post. Part 3 will be published shortly.

I read this post on MomGrind a couple of days ago and then left for my daily run. A day before that I had read this post on Freedom Writing. Both the posts had been responding to this post on IlluminatedMind where Jonathan asked his readers what is RIGHT with their lives?

As I ran, all I could think about was my life. It was like meeting an old friend … unearthing memories that I did not know existed…

Almost 15 years ago. Bangalore, India. In the waiting lounge of a hospital. With a cousin. Reflecting on life. There was not much else we could have done. Another cousin of mine had tried to overdose himself. But he was okay. Somebody had found him before it was too late. So my cousin and I sat and reflected on life and our attitudes to life.

“Would you ever consider suicide?”, he said.

I looked at him not knowing what to say. There had been times when life had seemed pretty bad. “I am not sure”, I said.

I had just enrolled into a technical Engineering degree. My cousin here had just enrolled into Law School. He loved postmortems …

“Well, you know. I am so confident. I do think I can achieve anything if I put my mind to it. I cannot imagine that life would ever get so bad that I would be forced to attempt suicide.”

I was still lost in my thoughts. “The world is too beautiful a place. Even if my life seems irreparable, I will hang on just because I believe there is so much more undiscovered beauty in this world”, I said. I did not say how irreparable my life had seemed to me on some days. I had never come very close to ending my life but I do remember that the thought had crossed my mind several times over the past several years … I had struggled with depression as a child for years and had no idea about it ….

Fast forward to a year ago. I haven’t felt “low” in years. 20 weeks pregnant with our second child. A test revealed an “echogenic foci” in the left ventricle of the child’s heart. A marker for downs syndrome. My husband and I were incredibly calm. The probability that we would have a healthy child was still greater that the probability that we would have a child with downs syndrome. Moreover, we knew we would love the child and celebrate her every accomplishment irrespective of whether she was healthy or “special”. But, for some reason, over the next few months I prepared myself mentally to raise a “special” child… spending several sleepless nights wondering how my life would be come February 2008 … clearly some of the few hardest months of my life. On Feb 3, 2008, our little Meesha was born, little and very healthy.

Why do we have all these life experiences, I wonder …. and I remember, when we were kids, my mom always said, “Everything happens for the good. Always. Everytime. And the good will come eventually, give it just a little time and patience.”

Here and now. I stand at a juncture in my life where I experience nothing but sheer joy. I love my life for everything that  happened. I love my life for everything that did not happen. For my experiences with depression and my survival. For my struggles during my pregnancy and my healthy children. I love my life for all the people that have touched it - in big ways and small. And I love myself for my love for life

There you have it. The three things I love about my life.

What do you love about your life? Positive thoughts and positive energy are infectious ….and guess what, getting lost in our thoughts thinking about how great our life is can be nothing but good for our hearts, minds and souls. So please talk …I am all ears!

This is Part 2 of the Series titled “The key to happiness and balance is right with you, just learn to use it”. In Part 1 of the series, I told you exactly WHY we need a framework and introduced you to the “thinkmaya framework” foundation.In this Part 2 (here) of the series, I will talk about HOW we prepare ourselves to be able to apply the framework successfully.This is what I call Framework 101, a prerequisite for the Framework post. In Part 3, I will, with your help (see my request below), introduce the framework and discuss a few of it’s applications

Image by foretz

When we let our emotions, thoughts and actions communicate honestly with each other, they hold hands and walk together, leaving us in the Happy Core - free and joyful. Ready to live the present and explore the future. It means that we are aware of what we are doing, feeling and thinking. And those are conscious choices, in line with our basic life values and principles.

The “thinkmaya framework” essentially deals with learning how to pull yourself back into your Happy Core.

Study the accompanying picture. At any point in time, you might be in one of the regions 1- 6 . 1, 2 and 3 are the pure regions where you are being completely emotional, completely intellectual and completely physical. Regions 4, 5 and 6 indicate the overlapping regions. When we are faced with different situations in life, we move away from our happy core into one of these regions. This is where the thinkmaya framework comes in.

The framework works like a GPS. You give it your current coordinates. Then you tell it where you want to be. The GPS or my framework will tell you HOW to get there. In order to apply the framework and pull ourselves back into the Core, I  will repeatedly tell you to engage in facilitating communication between your heart, mind and. But how exactly do we align these inner voices?

When I first started this post, I assumed it would be the second and last one in the series. However, when I turned around and put the explanation of the framework together, it appeared so clinical. I could not possibly present a broad based framework for you without preparing you some more in order to make sure you have the opportunity to internalize the framework, as opposed to just read it. Hopefully, it is a journey for you all as it is for me. And in many ways, your comments help me write and rewrite my future posts - and I cherish that. I apologize for my change of plan but I hope you will eventually see value in my decision.

If you are too busy working on the happiness and balance in your life and do not have the time to read the complete post, just skip over to the slideshare at the end of the post …

[ Before you begin, make sure you have the right ingredients in your life and learn some counter intuitive way to kick start your happiness. And then, work on that honest internal communication by following the pointers below ]

In the simplest terms, achieving honest internal communication is like watching a bunch of rambunctious kids and putting them in their places. And these are my pointers for being able to tame those inner voices:

1. Know what your core values, principles and dreams in life are. Write them down. And look at them often. I have a mindmap which essentially is a representation of me and my values. I look at it every time I am making small and large life decisions, to see if my decisions truly align with my core values, principles and dreams.
2. Develop a relationship with yourself. What you call this relationship with yourself is immaterial. It should however be one of love, respect and empathy. I liken it to your relationship with a 3 year old that you really love and care for. If you really want to work with yourself to improve your life, then you have to be your own best friend and a very accepting one at that. Talk so you will listen and listen so you will talk. Getting yourself to listen and talk will be key on your list of priorities.
3. Monitor yourself. All the time. Make it a habit. Step back every so often and watch yourself like you watch another person. Question your every move. Your every thought, action and emotion. Interrogation is the only sure shot way of keeping yourself accountable. This is something that develops over a long time. But when you have continued to ask yourself the questions long enough, you reach the core motivation behind your expressions. Once you have hit that core you are able check and see if what you are on the outside aligns with your core values and principles. It sounds hard at first, but all it takes is a little time and discipline. Soon enough, you don’t even notice the interrogation anymore.
4. Accept that your thoughts, actions and emotions will not always be aligned with your principles. If they are not aligned, do not go off on a long wound battle with yourself. The whole point of watching yourself is to make your life better, through constant feedback. Empathize. Embrace the real you. Always give yourself the time and space to change. Work on changes in small steps, in little increments.
5. Be prepared to work with yourself. Committing to working with yourself is like committing to taking care of a 2 year old child that insists on making all the decisions assuming he/she has all the knowledge. You will think wrong thoughts and have deplorable feelings time after time. You have to be understanding but stern with yourself. You have to correct yourself over and over again. You will need a mountain of patience in order to do this consistently.
6. Call yourself out on small and big mistakes alike. There are really no excuses. Letting yourself go for doing or saying “little things” is the point where you get off on the wrong side of the road. And then, it is very easy to lose your way.
7. Give yourself time and be reasonable with yourself. Guess what, nobody changes in a day. Understanding that you did or said something wrong is a big part of the game but making the change deep within yourself is the bigger part of the game. You are an intelligent individual, so treat yourself as such. If you want to change something about yourself, don’t just ask yourself to change but give yourself the right reason to change. A reason that resonates with your core passions, principles and values.Negotiate with yourself if the going gets hard. Find creative ways to motivate yourself.
8. There are no absolutes. No right or wrongs. Make sure you look at every action, emotion and thought in context. Always go back to the core motivation to decide if what you did was wrong.

Try the above pointers and let me know what you think? Do these work for you? How do you keep the lines of communication open with yourself? And how do you ensure you are honest and true to yourself?

Here are a list of people who already shared some ideas from last week. I am grateful to them for they have really fueled my thinking and I want to give them their due credit:

Avani-Mehta - “One answer that popped is by staying true to our values…”

Shamelle - “So many of us get caught up in looking outside ourselves for happiness when, in fact, happiness is something that you can choose at any time.”

Stacey - ” I think of this core connection as synchronizing your authentic voice.”

Jean - “They realize that the quality of our lives depends on how we focus our energy and our attention. They try to align their thoughts and actions with their values. They know how to motivate themselves to take action.”

Mare - “It’s so true that we have these three different voices all speaking from a different perspective that we need to coordinate. I also think that each one of us has a tendency to listen more to one over the other two.”

Here is the slideshare for this post (best viewed full screen):

Here is a request I have from all of you to help me with my next post where I share the framework.

Think about a situation you are having an issue with and share the following with me:

1. What is the situation ?

2. What are you feeling, doing and/or thinking about it? (What is your present region based on the framework pic above?)

3. What do you ideally want to feel, do and think about this problem? (What is your ideal destination based on the framework pic above?)

Share it with me here and I will address how the framework would recommend going from 2 to 3.  If it is not something that you want to put in the comments section, just email me at m@thinkmaya.com

Tags: framework, recovery

It is hard to believe that we really have control over the happiness our in our lives. It is even harder to believe that there are very simple things we can do to balance our lives in this chaotic world. Yes, the key is right with us, all we need to do is understand HOW to use it. Most people look for a list of things to do at this point, but I believe in giving you a framework that you probably will be able to apply in most cases and come up with a list of things that will work just for you.

If you are too busy working on the happiness and balance in your life and do not have the time to read the complete post, just skip over to the slideshare at the end of the post …

How did I come upon this?

Through trial and error. Through continuous introspection. Through continuous analysis. Throughout my life. I do not claim that it is the answer to everything, but it is a start and a very good one at that. Over the years, I have applied it in my life for little things and big and it always seems to help me find that missing factor in my happiness. I am curious to see what people think of it and if other people will indeed find it useful.

The Background

Life is hard. Really hard. Relationships can be hard on us. And then there are responsibilities, obligations and finances. Life has challenges. We are constantly being tested - physically, emotionally and intellectually. How is it that some people seem to deal with it with wonderful poise and some of us get completely overwhelmed from time to time? I think the key lies in how people take consume and internalize this complicated web the world presents. The key lies in how we untangle this web and roll up a fresh new ball of yarn for ourselves and weave our lives from it with a wonderfully new perspective. We are what we think, do and feel. The magic lies in guiding ourselves, slowly nudging ourselves to be the person we want to be…

Let me use a picture to explain how we all are inherently made. At our very core, each of us is made of our heart, brain and body. At every moment in our lives these three components are alive, participating and communicating with each other.. making us feeling, thinking, acting human beings.

The heart, brain and body manifest externally as our feelings/emotions, thoughts and  actions respectively. The combination of feelings, thoughts and actions is what makes up our expressions .What we are on the outside is nothing but an expression of what we are on the inside. And what we are on the inside is a function of how we internalize our life experiences, situations and challenges.

If you agree with that,you should also agree that we should never be a victim of our experiences and situations since we have total control over how we internalize it all. And if we choose happiness, we will be happiness! Right?

Right. But not so easy.

The world is complex and our minds, bodies and hearts are constantly bombarded with stimulation … sending conflicting messages to every part of our being. In this noise, we lose the ability to hear our feelings and thoughts. When we stop hearing, we lose the ability to respond to our thoughts and feelings …we lose the ability to respond to ourselves. Very soon, we find ourselves acting in ways we do not believe, saying things we do not mean and reacting to situations in ways we do not think appropriate. We continue to do things that we know make us unhappy. What is more, when we have done this long enough, this becomes our truth and we go every distance to justify it.

And then we wonder why we are not happy.

What is the framework?

When we let our emotions, thoughts and actions communicate honestly with each other, listen to each other and collaborate, they help us make the right decisions for a happy life. They hold hands and walk together, leaving us in the Happy Core - free and joyful, ready to live the present and explore the future.

The thinkmaya framework will show you HOW to do this.

Here is a short version of my post above (best viewed in full screen mode):

The next part  of this series will introduce you to the “thinkmaya framework for happiness and balance“. If you have liked what you have read so far be sure to subscribe to my blog through a reader or by email.

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Tags: framework